These costs hit harder than a tossed bridal bouquet.

“Do you know how much your sister is spending on her friend’s wedding?”

That's my mum, indignation dialled up to 11. Now, the sibling code typically says you never reveal your sister’s secrets to your mother but in this case I actually didn’t know. I was about to find out. A quick chat with my sister turned into a jaw-dropping crash course in wedd-onomics.

It all starts with the magic words: Will you be my bridesmaid? Suddenly, you’re in a cloud of tulle and Pinterest boards, sipping champagne and dreaming of picture-perfect wedding days. But before you can say “I do” to the dress, your wallet is screaming “I don’t!”—because here comes the real price of friendship.

From international flights for the hens’ weekend to themed outfits you’ll wear once (and hate forever), being a bridesmaid isn’t just a role—it’s a monetary commitment. Toss in crippling student loans and a housing market that makes owning a first home feel like chasing unicorns, and your best friend’s walk down the aisle transforms into a debt trap.

'If you're going to tell me that I have to wear a specific colour, you need to buy the clothes for me.'

What starts as a fairytale can quickly turn into a financial horror story. Two 20-something bridesmaids sat down with Newsworthy to unpack their rude awakenings to the cost of joining a bridal party.

As someone with first-hand knowledge of Bridesmaid No.1 (yes, she’s my sister), I can’t help but wonder: is it fair to ask friends to shoulder such hefty financial burdens?

Karu Baskaran understands the once-in-a-lifetime nature of weddings but it's not her wedding.SUPPLIED

Bridesmaid No.1: Pack a passport for hens night

“Hi, my name is Karu Baskaran. I'm 24 years old, and I'm going to be a bridesmaid for one of my friends who's getting married in December.”

“I’ve known this friend since we were children,” she says, but when the time to be asked came, she was taken aback: “Honestly, I didn’t expect to be a bridesmaid.” With 10 bridesmaids in total, she found herself quickly swept into a wedding frenzy!

The bridal activities piled up quickly. “We’ve had a couple of events to kind of get ready,” she explains. It all began with a dinner to celebrate the bride-to-be, followed by a bridal shower on a cruise she organised. “Then she’s having two bachelorettes—one in Malaysia and another overnight stay in Sydney for those who couldn’t make it.”

But the costs? They hit harder than a bouquet toss.

“The initial dinner was $50 per person, plus we chipped in for a spa gift,” Karu recalls. The international bachelorette trip, however, is where things really escalated: “Flights were $450, the hotel another $450, and spending money looks to be about $1,000.”

As she calculates the numbers, it becomes clear: with a bridal shower gift of $200, themed outfits costing $500, and everything else, the costs just keep on coming.

“So, all in all, I'm going to be spending about $3,250 for this wedding.”

That’s money that won’t go to paying off Karu’s student loan or towards the deposit she’s saving for her own place.

“Right now, I'm trying to save for a house with my partner, so any amount spent has been quite difficult and has been needed to be budgeted quite well,” she admits. “I didn't anticipate when I was first asked that it would come with all these associated costs. I've never been a bridesmaid before, so I kind of just expected to show up on the day and maybe have a small hens affair or something. But it's kind of blown out to be much bigger than I thought.”

This sentiment reflects a broader trend. Pop culture site The List calculated it cost an already hefty $1,800 to be a bridesmaid in 2021 but in the years since then, that price tag had jumped 52 per cent to an average cost of $2,750 in 2024.

While Karu understands the once-in-a-lifetime nature of weddings, she can't shake the feeling that it’s unreasonable to expect her to fork over so much cash for an event she didn’t plan. “It does seem quite extreme to expect people to spend that kind of money for an event that you’ve kind of chosen to have.”

In her eyes, friendship shouldn’t come with a hefty price tag—and the balance sheet proves it!

Kalyani : 'If you're going to tell me to wear a specific colour you need to buy the clothes for me.'SUPPLIED

Bridesmaid No.2: Not so pretty in pink

“Hi, my name is Kalyani. I'm 25 years old, and I am soon to be a bridesmaid for two of my friends.”

“I have been friends with them since primary school, so I kind of assumed that I would be a bridesmaid.” The requests were still sweet surprises. “One of them had, like, a whole dinner planned where she invited all her bridesmaids, and we went to this bar.” For another friend, it was a more personal touch: “She gave me a little care package, like a little personalised makeup bag, and was like ‘Here, be my bridesmaid.’”

As Kalyani (surname withheld at her request), dives headfirst into her bridesmaid responsibilities, she is already grappling with logistics. “We’ve had to organise the hens' weekend, which includes finding an Airbnb and liaising with all the other bridesmaids about costs and when they’re free,” she explains. “I even designed a funny T-shirt for everyone to wear!”

But as the plans unfold, the expenses start multiplying fast.

“For one of the weddings, the Airbnb costs $400 each for two nights,” she calculates, adding, “We also need to print the T-shirts, which will be about $25 each. And then there’s a clay-and-sip night that will probably cost around $60 for supplies.” And that’s without the drinks and groceries for the hens.

And let’s not even get started on outfits. “So, the lehenga for a reception for one of them is like close to $250 or $300.” She adds frustrated: “They've told me that I had to wear a specific colour. If you're going to tell me that I have to wear a specific colour, you need to buy the clothes for me. Because it's not my fault that you decided you wanted all your bridesmaids to wear pastel pink. And I need to find another specific pink dress for a themed night, which I just don’t wear. I’ll need to spend another $60 just for that!”

One wedding includes a hens’ trip to Bali, and Kalyani is expected to jet off.

“I'm planning on going to go live in Europe next year, and so she fully expects that I will fly over to Bali for her hens,” Kaylani says.

And that’s not all. “Then her wedding would also happen while I'm still in Europe, and she fully expects me to fly to back to Australia for her wedding”. A round trip to Bali and Australia from Europe averages a cost of $1450-1900 and $1800-2700 respectively.

As her bridesmaid budget expands, she can’t help but wonder, will this ever end?

“I'm young. I'm like, 26 I'm like, trying to save up for my life. Like, do I need to be spending this much money? I didn't expect to be spending this much money on these things.”

On who should bear the cost, she says: “I get it... there’s a certain amount of money they have to pay per head... but that’s your fault for organising something so elaborate.”

*****

WHATEVER my mother's intentions, this crash course in bridesmaid economics has made one thing crystal clear: the bridesmaid extravaganza isn’t for me. Sure, friendship is priceless, but when I look at those dollar signs, I can’t help but think — if the day ever comes – my friends can skip the matching pastel pink. They’ll thank me when their wallets survive intact.

It’s easy to see why bridesmaids are feeling the pinch, especially with the soaring costs and influencer-fuelled expectations of what makes the perfect wedding. So, before you ask someone to be your bridesmaid, maybe take a step back and think: how can you make it work without bankrupting them? And, more importantly, how will you explain the ballooning costs to their mother?

– Podcast interview by Liliana Garcia and Audrey Barker.